A Leap of Faith

Exactly one week later Jeff and I sat in his car again. The date was February 29, 2004; it was a leap year. Strange things seem happen on that extra day once every four years and this was no exception.

The scene was much the same as the week before: we had spent the morning at church, the afternoon with Jeff's family, and we were now parked in "our spot," awaiting the pending discussion.

"So," Jeff began, "how has this week been?"
"Better than I expected." I replied.
"Really?" I couldn't help but smile at the eagerness in his voice.

My thoughts turned to the prior week. I recalled the afternoons we had spent together, completely void of any tension caused by wondering what the future would hold. I felt I could talk to him about anything, and I realized that I wanted to always be able to talk to him about anything and everything. By acting as though the decision to be together was behind us, I had been able to focus on our relationship and give it the attention and commitment it would need to endure through the years, not just the semester. And through it all, I had felt a wonderful sense of calm and happiness. Never once had anxiety or doubt entered into the picture.

"Yes, Jeff. It was absolutely wonderful-- the best week we've had to date."
"I thought so, too," he responded quietly. He was looking down at his hands, but I could see the grin on his face. When he looked up at me, his eyes were glistening ever so slightly.

"Carly, you know that I love you. I love everything about you and I love being with you. The thought of losing you is heart-wrenching, but the thought of having you forever brings me joy and happiness I didn't know was possible. This past week has been amazing. I've been able to drop my defenses and actually believe that this is it. That you are it. That you are the last person I will ever date, ever kiss, every love in this way."

At this point the tears were streaming down my face as well. I could hardly speak; the love I felt for him was so overwhelming. For a while we just sat there, crying and smiling and laughing together. If we hadn't been so emotional, it would have been hilarious. I slid as far as I could on my seat so that I was halfway on the armrest and embraced him. We sat that way for a long time, cherishing the moment and letting the mood linger. Finally, I reluctantly pulled back and looked into Jeff's face.

"So what do we do now?"
"Well, you said this was a good week. Was it good enough to continue indefinitely?" I let his question sit for a moment, evaluating it's meaning.
"What exactly are you asking?"
"I'm just asking if this week has been enough for you to make a decision about the rest of our lives."
"I... I don't know. I think so. I don't know."
"Well, thanks. That helps a lot." His sarcasm carried all the hurt and hopelessness that I had heard in his voice so many times before. I didn't want him to feel that way anymore. I was tired of being flaky and indecisive. This was it. I was going to make a choice, once and for all. I was either going to take it or leave it and never look back. This week had been good-- better than good. It had been perfect. It had been everything I had ever hoped for and dreamed of. What else could I ask for? What more was I waiting for? We'd only been dating for just over 4 months, but once you know this is the one... what's the point of waiting? With a burst of energy, I turned to face Jeff with a huge smile on my face.

"Let's get married," I blurted.
"Wha-- are you sure?"
"I'm sure. Are you sure?"
"Yes, I-- I just wasn't expecting-- what the heck. Let's get married!"
He leaned over and kissed me, figuratively and literally sealing the deal. I pushed on his chest after a moment, whispering, "There is one condition, however."
"What's that?"
"Ask me again tomorrow."